Grieve For Me Not
by lupinsstar
Summary: You'd think a simple unopened letter wouldn't be so important when really, it's the start of moving on. plain 10Rose oneshot


A/N: Aargh! To all that read my fic, The Seven Laws of Attraction, I apologise for not updating since February. The only explanation is that to those that will understand, I'm a year 11 with the dreaded GCSE's upon me and have no time, so making up for it, here's a one shot I got the idea for ages ago and never wrote, hope you enjoy! xxx

Disclaimer: Poem is Christina Rossetti's and Doctor Who isn't mine…happy? I'm not.

Rose sighed as she sat at her desk; another day at Torchwood, feigning a smile to those around her, pretending that she belonged when truly she felt as though she never would. A year had passed since that day at the beach, the day she didn't like to think about- it was too much for her to bear, knowing she would never see him again. If she didn't remember that he had said so, then she had hope, something to believe in, and as long as she had her belief then she could at least attempt happiness. Not true happiness, just enough to keep her mum of her back. For Jackie had not left her alone at first, being the caring mother she is, Rose had to prove that she was getting on with life on that Earth, getting over the Doctor. She never would, but she tried to make it seem so, for her mum's sake.

Tiredly, she glanced at an envelope on her desk, wondering whether to bother opening it or not. It had just appeared at Torchwood one day addressed to her, she had never opened it, not thinking much of it. No one else had seen it either, and judging by the fact it only said 'Rose' on it, it was not Torchwood important. Rose looked at the clock on her wall. She had ten minutes before her meeting, and nothing to occupy herself. Finding herself with free time, she picked up the envelope gingerly, and slowly opened it, pulling out the contents. She had expected a letter, but within the envelope was a picture also, and something that looked rather like the Doctor's sonic screwdriver. Tears filled her eyes with the thought of him as she slowly unfolded the letter she received. A couple of photos fell out of it; a picture of her and the old Doctor and another of her and the Doctor after his regeneration. Fingers trembling, she picked the letter off the floor that had fallen with her amazement at seeing the pictures. Crying, she began to read the letter.

_My dearest Rose,_

_I bet you weren't expecting this, to tell you the truth, neither was I. I didn't find a proper way through, just a tiny little gap that the TARDIS could send a letter through, no idea if you'll even be alive when this finally turns up, I hope so though. I hope that not too much time has passed cos I can't bear to think that you might be hurting, especially if it's anything as much as I am. I cried after seeing you on that beach, me, crying! If anything was worth the tears of a Time Lord, you certainly are. It's been killing me that I didn't get to finish that sentence you know. I figured that you knew what I was going to say, you always were more than a match for me, but just in case, or if you wanted confirmation, Rose Tyler, I love you; I love with both my hearts, you mean more to me than anything ever has, and ever will. I won't forget you for as long as I live._

_I have someone travelling with me again. She's called Martha, not a patch on you though; no one will ever come close to your standard. We were in Italy last week, met up with Christina Rossetti. You remember her? Of course you do, wrote you a poem when we were there- she said it might help me come to terms with my loss. I certainly proved her wrong. And now, she's claimed it as her own, and you said I was rude! Anyway, I thought, seeing as it's for you, I'd include it in my letter for you, so here it is. _

_Remember me when I am gone away, _

_Gone far away into the silent land; _

_When you can no more hold me by the hand, _

_Nor I half turn to go, yet turning stay. _

_Remember me when no more day by day _

_You tell me of our future that you plann'd: _

_Only remember me; you understand _

_It will be late to counsel then or pray. _

_Yet if you should forget me for a while _

_And afterwards remember, do not grieve:_

_For if the darkness and corruption leave _

_A vestige of the thoughts that once I had, _

_Better by far you should forget and smile _

_Than that you should remember and be sad._

_I mean it Rose, truly I do. I never could stand seeing you upset, and I know you, I know you'll be holding on to that last bit of hope. Nothings impossible, I will admit, but we both know that the chances of us meeting again are one in a million. I guess you could argue that we always were against the odds- when I first met you I had no intention of finding someone to share my life with. You were different though Rose, you had such energy, you were special and you saved me even though you didn't know me. And for the record, I don't ever ask people twice, so consider yourself lucky my Rose. You saying yes was the best thing that ever happened to me too; you saved me from what the Time War made me and for that and for everything you gave me, I will be grateful for always. Our time together didn't quite meet that 'forever' we decided upon, but know this, Rose, I will love you for eternity, and I want you to do this one last thing for me Rose, just one thing. Have a fantastic life, live it to the full and cherish every second of it, you never know when something will be taken from you in a heartbeat._

_Goodbye my Rose,_

_The Doctor_

Rose sat down, crying for the man she loved, tears staining the already tear stained letter. Underneath her exterior, she was resolute; if it was his last wish for her that she had a fantastic life, she would try to do so, still clinging to the hope she had, but knowing that if they were to ever be reunited, he would be sad to see her so empty, a shell of her former self.

With a glint of determination in her eye, she dried her tears and folded the letter, placing the photographs along with the letter and her new sonic screwdriver in her pocket. Head held high, Rose Tyler walked to her meeting a good hour late, but with a new spring in her step. That evening Jackie commented on how different she seemed, as if she had come back to life, as if the old Rose was starting to reawaken within her. She never showed anyone the letter he had sent, but read it often, giving herself something to keep going for. She would not mourn him anymore, she would live for him.

A/N: Hope it was ok, I'm a bit out of practice with writing fanfiction. Any comments then leave a review! xxxxxxxx


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